Few roles in life are more demanding than that of a mother or father.
Added on top of a career, maintaining a household, keeping up with bureaucratic demands, it can all come to be a bit too much.
But Germany, which is known for promoting a healthy work-life balance, has a prescription for that – and it doesn’t involve picking anything up at the pharmacy.
Often called a Kur (which literally translates to cure), German parents who suffer symptoms related to long-term stress or burnout may be prescribed a retreat of up to four-weeks for themselves and their children.
These retreats often take place in spa towns - or otherwise at an idyllic location like a forest or the beach - and allow patients to enjoy a leisurely schedule and try new activities whilst engaging in light counselling. Meanwhile their children are also attended to throughout the day by professionals.
In many cases these retreats are paid for almost entirely by health insurance, and all mothers and fathers living in Germany are theoretically entitled to take one every four years.
The origin of the Kur
Originally designed specifically for mothers, the Kur was introduced shortly after World War II.
Elly Heuss-Knapp, who was a politician and wife to Germany's first president, founded the Müttergenesungswerk (MGW) to support exhausted mothers.
The MGW began to promote the Kur as a means of helping women cope with motherhood. Time for rest and healing would have been badly needed by many mothers at that time, especially for those whose husbands failed to return home from fighting.
Since then, the Kur has come to be prescribed more often for burn-out and has been extended to fathers as well – although it’s still taken far more often by mothers and their kids.
How common is it to take a Kur?
Theoretically every parent in Germany can attend a Kur, and have it paid for by insurance, once every four years. But it can be difficult to secure a spot in one – some retreat centres have waiting lists that are months or even years long.
There are more than 150 facilities across Germany offering a Kur or similar treatment, including 72 officially in the MGW network.
According to information on the MGW website, of 11.3 million mothers in Germany, roughly two million are in need of a retreat, but just 50,000 will receive one this year.
Most of the women treated at MGW facilities are between the ages of 36 and 45, and the amount of single parents who apply for a Kur is disproportionately high.
How can I be prescribed a retreat?
Primarily prescribed for cases of burn-out, doctors may consider prescribing a Kur for parents experiencing symptoms such as irritability, exhaustion, and insomnia, just to name a few.
In some cases, a parent might be prescribed a Kur by wellness staff at their place of work.
As reported by CNN Travel, Cécile Poirot, a Hamburg police officer, was recommended to take a Kur after falling into a cycle of constant tiredness and insomnia.
But not every workplace has staff responsible for checking on employees' well-being, and you don’t need to wait for a crisis to apply for a retreat.
If you’d like to inquire about or apply for a Kur, a good place to start is with a Kurberatung (retreat consultation), such as Kurberatung Deutschland, which will help you navigate the process of applying for a retreat and getting the treatment covered by your health insurance.
MGW also offers counselling services, as does Caritas, the AWO health service, and Kurhilfe.de.
Does it really work?
Obviously, a multi-week retreat won't magically erase all the stresses of being a working parent, or cure all of the physical and mental issues that can come with it.
But research does suggest that these retreats do have lasting benefits for the mothers and fathers who are able to participate, and for their children who attend as well.
"The great advantage of prevention is that you avoid a more severe form of disease," Claudia Kirsch, a researcher Hannover Medical School told the BBC about the effectiveness of a Kur. She added that beyond just having the time to relax, the therapeutic aspect of these retreats adds to their success.
Parents that check into a clinic are assessed and then prescribed a tailored routine including a mix of activities and therapies. In counselling sessions, they are offered advice for fostering healthier routines to help them cope when they return to everyday life.
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