'If you have a German partner then insist they speak German to you'

I am a 70 year-old Scot, who came to Freiburg in Baden-Wurttemberg, Germany from Edinburgh in 1996 and stayed.

I already had a basic knowledge of German through my Steiner School education and evening classes before I arrived. My first German girlfriend insisted I only speak German with her, although her English was good, because she said that I live in Germany and should improve my language.

I happily agreed and tried to improve my German day by day. My next girlfriend, who later became my wife, continued this practice and only spoke German with me.

At that time, my employer sent me to classes at his expense in advanced German, because my language was still shaky. There, I learned grammar for written German, that I had not yet been taught. As time went on, my German became fluent and I could speak and write German without hesitation (except for der, die and das, of course!)

When I decided to become a German citizen in 2015 (I could see the writing on the wall in Britain), I sat and easily passed the B1 German test at the Volkshochschule without having to do any classes.

I became a dual citizen in November 2015 and could relax during the Brexit referendum.

When you want to learn German and have a German spouse or partner, I strongly suggest you insist on speaking German, when you are together.  In my very first relationship with a German, before I came to Germany this time, my girlfriend could speak English excellently and we only talked in my native language.

'At the very least buy a pocket dictionary'

This was fine while we were travelling the world, but became a hindrance for me, after we returned to Germany. I simply could not get any job without knowing German. I had to return to Britain, because our money ran out. I broke up with her several years later, when it became clear that I was not returning soon.

I was very sad that I had to leave her. That initial misfortune made me determined to become fluent in German.

As well as going to evening class in German, I went back to University, studying IT for a Postgraduate Diploma, and was ultimately awarded a Master's degree in Information Systems. With this qualification, I got a job in Freiburg as a programmer (my ex-girlfriend gave me the tip). In that first IT position, employees spoke both German and English, so I kept my native language.

Much later, I became a member and finally administrator of a Facebook group for English speakers in Freiburg. We meet regularly and converse in English and I thus stay fluent in my native language.

I know Americans and British here, who can still only speak English, although their spouse, steady girlfriend or boyfriend is German. I find that sad.

If you want to live here and can afford evening classes, I feel strongly that you should learn German.

At the very least, buy a pocket dictionary and look up any new words that you hear on the street. As German is a phonetic language, it is very easy to figure out how words are spelled.

Kenneth Aitken, Freiburg

This comment was in response to a recent article on The Local titled: Is it 'arrogant' to live in Germany and not learn German

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