• Germany edition
Lifestyle
The Local List
Photo: DPA

Bikes and body hair - German Valentine tips

Published: 14 Feb 13 10:34 CET | Print version
Online: http://www.thelocal.de/lifestyle/20130214-47961.html

Navigating the path of love in a foreign country is undeniably tricky, so this Valentine's Day The Local's team of inter-cultural dating experts has come up with ten top tips to help in dating a German.

1. Firstly, there is no fashionably late in Germany - be on time.

2. The date went well, and now you want to stalk them on Facebook. No chance; Germans take data protection and online privacy very seriously and if they haven't given themselves a fake name they may well have a completely private profile.

3. Germans like bikes, so if you are confident enough to mix a few Rieslings with two wheels, go to a date on your bike, as they likely will too. It's the helmet dilemma - risk arriving with squashed hair or getting brain damage when falling off on the way home?

4. Directness can be a blessing and a curse but to Germans it's the only way. This may reduce small-talk to a minimum. Browse a couple of newspapers beforehand to keep conversation flowing and avoid being outed as an ignorant expat.

5. As a foreigner, you're probably here to work. But many Germans your age may well still be studying, even into their early 30s. This doesn't mean your date is endlessly retaking exams, but may rule out a number of conversational gambits.

Valentine photo 36871109.jpg
Click here for dating tips in pictures

6. Don't worry about your German skills - they will probably speak English better than you speak German, or even English for that matter.

7. Expect to split the bill for dinner - a German woman will mean it when she offers to pay half, while a German man will accept even your most half-hearted suggestion to share. Cut the squabbling and go Dutch.

8. Managed to make your way back to theirs and into a state of undress? Don't panic when the hairy bits are in different places than you might expect - shaved armpits, chests and nether regions can be common on men - and less common on women. Embrace it, a little role reversal never did any harm.

9. Germans seem to have an unfathomable propensity for sickening nicknames, so get used to be called Mausi, (little mouse) Schatzi, (little treasure), Zaubermaus (magic mouse) and, The Local's personal favourite, Kuschelbär (cuddly bear).

10. Finally; single and hoping to meet that special someone in a bar? Think again because unlike Anglo friends, Germans tend to be less inclined to go scouting for a night of passion in the country's many, many watering holes. This means that you'll likely arrive and leave with the same people you went out with.

What do you think? Leave your comment below.


Your comments about this article:

12:25 February 14, 2013 by yllusion
This was pretty funny :-) Liked it.
13:11 February 14, 2013 by Firmino
Good article! It was quite funny and has good advice. I haven't been living in Germany for very long so some useful tips for me here!
13:32 February 14, 2013 by ichbines
Better yet, go home! Don't stop on go don't collect 200 dollars, just go home!
13:37 February 14, 2013 by The-ex-pat
Germans like bikes, so if you are confident enough to mix a few Rieslings with two wheels, go to a date on your bike........

Are you really advocating drink driving Local, you do know that pedal bike or car the law sees no difference in Germany....??
14:18 February 14, 2013 by Omufu
The-ex-pat is right! If you drink and cycle you can get points deducted from your car license :P
14:21 February 14, 2013 by Firmino
Yeah, drinking and riding a bike is a really stupid thing to do.
16:02 February 14, 2013 by ELDUDERINO
But I like doing stupid things. It's part of my cultural makeup.

Also, you need to have a drivers licence in order to have points added to it...
16:04 February 14, 2013 by Lykurgus
Drinking gives me the courage to ride a bike in Germany.

Especially when the streets are narrow.
16:17 February 14, 2013 by rugbycoach
In Germany, if you are cycling on a designated cycle path you are allowed to be twice the driving alcohol limit. This does not apply sharing the road where the usual limit applies.
19:10 February 14, 2013 by The-ex-pat
16:02 February 14, 2013 by ELDUDERINO

But I like doing stupid things. It's part of my cultural makeup.

Also, you need to have a drivers licence in order to have points added to it...

Try it and you will see how wrong you are..........You can also be in the situation where you will be required to take the idiot test to be able to ride your bike again. This has been reported more than one here.

16:17 February 14, 2013 by rugbycoach

In Germany, if you are cycling on a designated cycle path you are allowed to be twice the driving alcohol limit. This does not apply sharing the road where the usual limit applies.

Again, give it a whirl and see how long you are without your four wheel Pferd.....

http://bicyclegermany.com/german_bicycle_laws.html
04:19 February 15, 2013 by RainerL
Yes! Go home and save your money before blowing it on Pussy
08:23 February 15, 2013 by Bryant2012
LOL. I couldn't have said it any better RainerL:)
17:10 February 22, 2013 by CoolBlueIce
I've often wondered how people get together in Germany to make baby Germans in the first place. I've dated women from lots of different countries and no one even comes close to the "unnahbar" women in Germany.

For example, try flirting with a woman on a bus. In 1/100th of a second you will get the death glance messages that translates to, "Drop your eye contact now or risk my using this giant meat hook, which I keep in my purse for just such occasions, to hang you upside down by your testicles from yonder tree."

I know that's a lot of information to convey in 1/100th of a second, but somehow they get the job done.
21:24 February 27, 2013 by Bigfoot76
CoolBlueIce said "I've often wondered how people get together in Germany to make baby Germans in the first place".

Well that is the problem we are having here. People are not getting together and making "baby Germans". The population is in decline. We better start sending those ladies to the bar to meet men eh?
ADD YOUR COMMENT   (YOU MUST LOG IN OR REGISTER TO MAKE A COMMENT)
Today's headlines
Photo: DPA

Hollande praises tough German reforms

French President Francois Hollande, attending the 150th anniversary celebrations of Germany's Social Democratic Party on Thursday, praised the unpopular welfare and labour reforms by former Chancellor Gerhard Schröder. READ () »

Photo: DPA

Keep your socks on – autumn is in the air

Much of Germany is heading for an autumnal weekend, with chilly temperatures an at times significant rainfall – just as May draws to an end and socks should be heading for the back of the drawer. Some areas will even see snow and frost. READ () »

Photo: DPA

Brewers: 'No fracking with our German beer'

A group of brewers has raised alarm that so-called 'fracking' for natural gas could jeopardize the legendary purity of German beer by contaminating the country's water supplies. READ () »

The Local List
Photo: DPA

Ten German body parts

The German language has some rather colourful terms for describing parts of the human body. Turn to The Local List this week for a few anatomical alternatives. READ () »

Photo: DPA

Hipster Berlin dogs get meaty frozen yoghurt

Healthy dogs have wet noses, but cold and creamy canine noses may be a sign that they've been treated to a doggy frozen yoghurt made in Berlin. Rather than chocolate or pistachio, flavours include salmon and beef. READ () »

Photo: DPA

Germany tops world popularity poll

Germany is the most popular country in the world, according to a poll released on Tuesday asking people to rate the positive and negative influence of 16 major nations. READ () »

Photo: DPA

Dortmund's Götze ruled out of Wembley final

A hamstring injury has ruled Borussia Dortmund's Germany midfield star Mario Götze out of Saturday's Champions League final at Wembley against Bayern Munich – the club he will join next month after activating a release clause in his contract. READ () »

Photo: DPA

Grey seals return to German Baltic shores

The small population of grey seals on the Baltic Sea has increased significantly, with hopes rising that they may start breeding soon, conservationists reported on Wednesday. READ () »

More Lifestyle
RECEIVE OUR NEWSLETTER AND ALERTS
Highlights
Photo: DPA
LIFESTYLE »
New in German cinemas: 'Fast & Furious 6'
Photo: DPA
OPINION »
The Germans have a particular phobia – they live in constant fear of being blamed for something. A commentary by Der Tagesspiegel's Malte Lehming.
Photo: Private
LIFESTYLE »
In the latest installment of My German Career, The Local spoke with New Zealander physicist Graham Appleby about life in Germany's scientific community.
Photo: DPA
SOCIETY »
20,000 Goths gather in Leipzig
Photo: DPA
LIFESTYLE »
Harmless pink fun or a bad influence on young girls? A life-size Barbie dream house attraction opened in Berlin to protests including a topless woman burning a doll in effigy.
Photo: DPA
OPINION »
At his final heartbeat I knew I had to act. Our German of the Week is Tina K., who, after her brother was beaten to death, has been campaigning for an end to street violence in Berlin.
Photo: DPA
LIFESTYLE »
The Local List: Ten German words with double meanings
Photo: DPA
SOCIETY »
Conflict is part of the fabric of Berlin, but the city's "Peacemaker" soothes things over. Jessica Ware tracked him down for a chat.
Photo: DPA
OPINION »
It might be politically toxic, but it's time to hit the brakes on Germany's reckless driving culture, argues The Local's Ben Knight.
Photo: M&S
SPONSORED ARTICLE
Move over Berlin: why London is Germany's new fashion capital
Photo: Private
OPINION »
For this edition of My German Career, former US military man turned armed guard Keith Alban talks about leaving home in search of a better quality of life.
Photo: Katie Needs
SOCIETY »
Offseason, Germany's largest island Rügen might not top many peoples' list of dream holidays. But as The Local discovered, its quiet beauty makes it worth a trip to escape city bustle.
Photo: DPA
OPINION »
Confused about the hundreds of euros missing from your pay packet? Don't panic - the latest in The Local's JobTalk series looks at German social security payments.
Photo: DPA
LIFESTYLE »
Is that your Handy ringing? This week's Local List takes a look at 12 misused English words in German.
Photo: A Peoples' Picture
LIFESTYLE »
An American is stirring up creative spontaneity in Dresden by leaving disposable cameras around for strangers' use, before collecting them and displaying the results online.
Photo: Private
LIFESTYLE »
After it was revealed that Angela Merkel had a Polish grandfather, Matthew Luxmoore set out to find where she could connect to her roots in Berlin's sizable Polish community.
Photo: DPA
LIFESTYLE »
Why isn't everyone wearing Lederhosen? It's easy for foreigners to stereotype Germany, but this week's Local List is dedicated to debunking common myths.
Photo: Private
OPINION »
The last time Si Liberman saw Berlin, he was thousands of feet in the air on a US bombing raid over Nazi Germany. Nearly seven decades later, he returned to the city.
Photo: DPA
OPINION »
What are the hidden rules of etiquette foreigners need to watch out for while doing business in Germany? The Local's JobTalk series has tips for keeping on the right side of your colleagues.
Photo: DPA
NATIONAL »
All of The Local's 'Germans of the Week' so far
Photo: DPA
NATIONAL »
Every town and city from The Local's My Germany series
Monster/jobpilot.de
SPONSORED ARTICLE
Eighty per cent of Germans apply for jobs online
Furniture Leasing Corporation
SPONSORED ARTICLE
The furniture-free way to relocate to Germany
Photo: Henrik Trygg/imagebank.sweden.se
SPONSORED ARTICLE
Top five reasons to enrol on an Executive MBA



Latest news from The Local in France

More news from France at thelocal.fr

Latest news from The Local in Norway

More news from Norway at thelocal.no

Latest news from The Local in Sweden

More news from Sweden at thelocal.se

Latest news from The Local in Switzerland

More news from Switzerland at thelocal.ch

See all ads | Join the Marketplace

Jobs in Germany, in English

948 jobs available
701 new jobs this week
125 new jobs today

ALL JOBS »

Blog
Essentials

Dating
Looking for your own blonde bombshell? Or is the strong, silent type more your style? Find a German sweetheart here.

Weather
"After clouds comes clear weather," say the Germans. But what about after that? Find out in The Local's weather section.

Blog
German stuff that's distracting us today.

Noticeboard
Whether you want to buy, sell, hire, announce or promote something, here's the place to do it - completely free of charge.

Discuss
Debate the news, ask for advice, make friends - or just let off steam.

Search News


Register

Register now for:
> Free use of noticeboard
> Special discounts
> Weekly news roundup
> Unlimited use of discuss

REGISTER FOR FREE »

News from the Goethe-Institut
News from Young Germany
  • So You Want to Be an Artist
    The tradition of hands-on training in the arts is alive and well in Germany. Interested in studying visual, performance, or sound arts? Keen to pursue graphic and product design, textiles, or typography? Germany is home to many exceptional art schools as well as a rich history of excellence in and support for the arts.
  • Frankfurt's Skyscrapers: A Guide
    Frankfurt is known for banks and skyscrapers. So what is behind the colossal glass, steel, and stone facades of the city’s buildings? Meet Frankfurt’s tallest.
  • Conference - Pioneers on Dual Training Abroad
    Germany‘s system of dual training is one of the foundations of its economic strength.
  • The all-German final in Wembley
    Bayern München and Borussia Dortmund are playing in the final of the Champions League at London’s Wembley Stadium.
  • German first feature film in Cannes
    A directorial debut from Germany makes it to the competition “Un Certain Regard” at the famous film festival on the Côte d’Azur.
News from DeutschlandOnline

Toytown Germany
Germany's English-speaking crowd
Trade CFDs with InterTrader.com
Start trading shares, equities, forex, etc. No commission on equities; Low min. margins. Apply for a CFDs account now!
Little house in Spain
'Charming, old, beamed cottage for holiday let in Jesus Pobre, Alicante, Spain
www.littlehouseinspain.com/
Albatross Insurance
Professional and qualified consultancy on all insurance and finance matters in Germany, Telephone: +49 2163 571 1740, Email: bg@albatross-assurance.com
www.albatross-assurance.com
Hotel reservations in Berlin
Visiting Berlin anytime soon? Book your hotel in Berlin here.
Rental apartments in Berlin
For home-from-home holiday accommodation, search for a Berlin apartment to rent.