Get off the S6 in second last stop Feldafing and you will be walking among apartments that cost €756 per 70 square metres - a snitch at Munich prices.
This is despite the fact Feldafing lies on Lake Starnberg. Surrounded by pristine waters and thick forests, with the Alps in the distance, this spot is the Germany you might see on a postcard.
Only €756 to live here? Sign us up! Photo: DPA
But get back into that S-Bahn and start travelling north into Munich, and just as the scenery deteriorates, the rental prices starts to rise.
By the time you get to Pasing, with its ghastly multi-storey mall, rents have climbed over €900. At Donnnersbergerbrücke, site of the central bus station, rents are over a thousand.
Click on the map for a bigger version! Source: ImmobilienScout
Stay on the train four more stops and you have reached the most expensive place on the Munich rail network, Marienplatz, where a 70 square metre apartment will cost €1,339 - and that’s not even including bills.
But would you want to live here with all the tourists? Photo: DPA
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Why does this madness continue? Because people want to be central. Because people would rather be next to a concert hall they can’t afford to go to, or a museum they’ll visit once and never walk into again than risk being cut off.
But is a flat in the tangled touristy mess of Karlsplatz really €650 better than one in Geltendorf, a place so traditional that if you come into town wearing anything other than blue and white you’ll be given suspicious sideways glances, and where spätzle is treated as a suspicious foreign import?
That is Bavaria - and thanks to the handy new map from ImmobilienScout you can buy your ticket to a life spent sitting under chestnut trees, slurping quark and redcurrant jam.