• Germany's news in English
 

Fake census forms probe drug consumption and penis size

Published: 11 May 2011 15:56 GMT+02:00

It is not clear whether the fake forms are an elaborate joke or an attempt at satire, but have been reported in Hesse, Lower Saxony and now Berlin.

The forms the same as the official version, and have been arriving since Monday, when the genuine census was sent out, according to daily Berliner Zeitung.

Initially the only distinguishing factor is that the fake census forms are delivered to mailboxes without an envelope. The questions seem genuine at first, but soon begin probing into some more-than-personal areas which don’t feature in the real thing.

One question asks participants, “which drugs do you take?”, giving them the option to tick boxes marked with options including LSD or cannabis.

Another delved into medical history, asking “have you ever undertaken a breast or penis enlargement procedure?”

“These questions were all entirely fictitious, we wouldn’t ask anything like that,” said Klaus Voy, Census Project Manager at the Brandenburg-Berlin Office of Statistics.

“Those opposing the census might have preferred it if we’d asked such questions, as it would have fuelled their argument.”

With the real census coming under fire from privacy advocacy groups for asking questions about immigration background and religion that are beyond EU requirements, some featuring on the joke census concerning “sexual orientation” may not initially appear fake.

The first results of the real census will be released in the autumn of 2012.

The Local/rm

The Local (news@thelocal.de)

Your comments about this article

17:28 May 11, 2011 by trash head
bawahaha

Nice one ! Could be from me.
18:49 May 11, 2011 by Englishted
Well mine is 12inches but I don't use it a rule.
19:07 May 11, 2011 by iseedaftpeople
to prove a point, they also should have asked

"On a scale from 1 to 5, how gullible do you consider yourself?"

;-)
01:48 May 12, 2011 by DavidtheNorseman
The real question is how many will be sent in to the Census Bureau and the information dillegently recorded and filed...LOL
08:40 May 12, 2011 by nz101
ha ha. Love it, good to know there are still some people out there with a sense of humour !
09:26 May 12, 2011 by Angry Ami
Well if they really must know

20 x 6 :-P
12:20 May 12, 2011 by Simon_Kellett
@iseedaftpeople> "On a scale from 1 to 5, how gullible do you consider yourself?"

Sorry, my Englisch is not good: what does "gullible" mean? (I can not find it in my diktionary.)
12:31 May 12, 2011 by iseedaftpeople
@Simon Kellett:

nice try ;-)

But in case you do want to know-

according to Random House Webster's College Dictionary:

gullible, adj. - easily deceived or cheated; naive; credulous.
13:08 May 12, 2011 by Dashcroft
angri ami: mine's the same - in inches!
13:31 May 12, 2011 by Englishted
12:31 May 12, 2011 by iseedaftpeople

@Simon Kellett:

nice try ;-)

But in case you do want to know-

according to Random House Webster's College Dictionary:

gullible, adj. - easily deceived or cheated; naive; credulous.

So like F.D.P. voters really.
13:46 May 12, 2011 by maxbrando
I believe that the real problem is that many, many Germans will think the fake form is the real one, and that the already intrusive German is just being itself!
14:16 May 13, 2011 by n230099
OK...that's funny!
23:29 May 13, 2011 by derExDeutsche
it would have found a closely linked correlation between penis size and drug consumption. individuals with larger penis' consume more drugs.
16:18 May 17, 2011 by Yousufzai
Interesting Questionnaire and Form . But can any body tell me that what size of Penis the people (esp. Girls) in Deutschland likes?
Today's headlines
'Hot Boy from Germany' wins Vietnam Idol
Image: Fremantle Media/YouTube

'Hot Boy from Germany' wins Vietnam Idol

A 22-year-old from Hanover has become the latest winner of Vietnam Idol – bagging $27,000 along with his new title. READ  

Man promises to stop coffin naps in public
If you want to rest in place while you're still alive, a car park isn't the place place to choose. Photo: DPA

Man promises to stop coffin naps in public

When a man walking his dog alerted police to the fact that a black coffin was lying in the middle of a public parking place, the cops were surprised to find someone inside. READ  

Court orders boss to pay worker for changing
Photo: Pixabay

Court orders boss to pay worker for changing

A mechanic from western Germany is set to receive €350 in back payments – after claiming he should be paid for the time he spent showering and getting dressed for work. READ  

In Pictures
Wacken festival draws metalheads of the world
A reveler at Wacken Open Air 2015. Photo: DPA

Wacken festival draws metalheads of the world

Armies of black-clad fans gathered for the world's biggest heavy metal festival between Thursday and Saturday, marking 25 years of headbanging fun in the small town of Wacken in northern Germany. READ  

Railway sunbather brings trains to a halt
Photo: DPA

Railway sunbather brings trains to a halt

A plucky sunbather brought train services in North Rhine-Westphalia to an abrupt halt at the weekend - after deciding to catch some rays on the tracks. READ  

Spiegel: Merkel wants fourth term in power
Angela Merkel. Photo: DPA

Spiegel: Merkel wants fourth term in power

According to Germany's most influential political magazine, Spiegel, Angela Merkel has decided to run for a fourth term in power and has already started talks on who will run her campaign. READ  

State leaders call for faster asylum processes
Refugees at a temporary reception centre in Baden Württemberg. Photo: DPA

State leaders call for faster asylum processes

Several state leaders called for more investment in processing asylum applications over the weekend as the backlog continues to put severe strain on current infrastructure. READ  

German sets Florida to Cuba speedboat record
Roger Klueh. Photo: Ernesto Mastrascusa / DPA

German sets Florida to Cuba speedboat record

A German businessman and power boating fanatic on Saturday broke a 57-year-old record for the fastest boat crossing between the United States and Cuba. READ  

Report: German refugee figures 'underestimated'
Migrants on a train on their way to the EU. Photo: Djordje Savic / DPA

Report: German refugee figures 'underestimated'

Germany has hosted more than 300,000 asylum seekers since the start of the year, said the daily Die Welt on Saturday, nearly 50,000 more than first thought, as Berlin prepares for a record influx of refugees in 2015. READ  

Migrant wounded in German police shooting
Photo: DPA

Migrant wounded in German police shooting

A Guinean migrant who caused a brawl in a home for asylum seekers in Germany was shot and seriously wounded by police, local media reported. READ  

RECEIVE OUR NEWSLETTER AND ALERTS
Business & Money
Start-up helps new Berliners short cut bureaucracy
National
The 1,000s of Germans massacred after the Second World War
Sport
Germany star scores own goal with PR gaffe
Features
'Women-only' parking: sensible or sexist?
Politics
Satire and reality blur in parody party's strife
National
13-year-old boy detained for trying to join Isis
Culture
Berlin restaurant serves up Greek Crisis Menu
Rhineland
Doctor on trial after woman wakes in morgue
Society
Six odd things Germans do in the summer
Sponsored Article
Outsourcing drives Apreel's Europe growth
Society
Police bust kinky Bavarian couple over painful love-making
Politics
Merkel brings Palestinian girl to tears
Hamburg
Amateur archaeologist finds Nazi gold hoard
National
Could Merkel learn a lesson in love from this doppelganger?
Travel
Why you should stay in Germany for the summer holidays
Sport
German press tell Schweinsteiger 'good riddance'
National
Hamburg gets a bouncing 100kg baby girl
Society
In North Germany, money sometimes DOES grow on trees
National
Hero mechanics stop Bavaria shooting spree
International
Denmark says that border controls are coming
National
Did hackers take control of German missile battery?
Politics
Munich gives gay pride green light
Business & Money
Berlin rent controls hit prices hard
National
Fighting to breastfeed in public without shame
Society
Ice cream for dogs 'gobbled up in one gulp'
Education
Are hotpants a feminist issue?
Rhineland
Lion cub reunited with mother
National
How the heatwave is cracking Germany's Autobahns
International
Why the French are more sympathetic to Greece than the Germans
Sponsored Article
Crans-Montana: International expat hub
Gallery
Police seize pensioner's WW2 heavy weapons haul
National
How to survive the Europe-wide heatwave
Sport
Is Schweini already out of the door at Bayern?
Politics
How German media shaped the Greece crisis
National
Car assembly robot crushes worker at Volkswagen
Rhineland
Weathermen red-faced over heatwave snow warning
Society
An eye for an eye? Mum protects child in playground with pepperspray
National
As it happened: Queen Elizabeth's final day in Germany
National
As it happened: Queen Elizabeth's second day in Germany
National
Queen Elizabeth II's first day in Germany - as it happened
National
Bus passengers tell fake racists where to get off
Latest news from The Local in Austria

More news from Austria at thelocal.at

Latest news from The Local in Switzerland

More news from Switzerland at thelocal.ch

Latest news from The Local in Denmark

More news from Denmark at thelocal.dk

Latest news from The Local in Spain

More news from Spain at thelocal.es

Latest news from The Local in France

More news from France at thelocal.fr

Latest news from The Local in Italy

More news from Italy at thelocal.it

Latest news from The Local in Norway

More news from Norway at thelocal.no

Latest news from The Local in Sweden

More news from Sweden at thelocal.se

7,116
jobs available
Toytown Germany
Germany's English-speaking crowd